The Times Will Serve No Brand Extension Before Its Time

Let's say you're an executive at a very established—but financially challenged—east coast newspaper that's sometimes accused of being elitist by pundits on the right. You're looking for a brand extension to create an additional revenue stream for your paper, which had a slightly better-than-expected second quarter, but is still struggling with declining ads and the Web eating away at it. This thing has to be irresistible to your readers, something that flatters them for having the good taste to read your established east coast newspaper, and compliments their lifestyle.

Oh, and it should play into every possible stereotype held against you and them, practically handing your critics ammunition for the latest round of cheap shots against you. Can one product do both those things at once?

Introducing the New York Times Wine Club.

According to an un-bylined piece in today's paper (and, really what writer would want his or her name attached to a piece of semi-naked shilling), the New York Times Company "will offer members a selection of wines at two price levels, $90 or $180 per six-bottle shipment, and customers can choose to have wine delivered every one, two or three months."

The Wall Street Journal, the San Francisco Chronicle, Sunset Magazine and Forbes all have similar clubs, and according to Thomas K. Carley, the Times Company senior vice president of strategic planning, “The Times is looking at a lot of different ideas for engaging our audience." And, it would seem, engaging its detractors by opening up new joke streams. (Really, why didn't the Times launch its own artisanal cheese club? Perhaps a nice green latte maker? Maybe a socialist indoctrination summer camp for kids? These bad jokes practically write themselves...)

"Wine-drinking liberal" is more or less the go-to taunt from Conservatives who wish to portray Democrats and progressives as out of touch or overly fancified. In fact, Democratic candidates deemed too effete or progressive are often tagged as "wine-track candidates, like Bill Bradley and John Kerry—the latter, a veritable poster boy for Democratic wine-sipping—by Time's Joe Klein when they endorsed Barack Obama for president in 2008.

If the Times wanted to avoid all that, they could've created their own beer. Now that would've play up their non-elitist bona fides. And imagine if President Obama served Brew York Times at his next beer summit: It could open a whole new genre of news product placement.

Besides, a Times-branded beer would tap (ha?) the 42 percent of Americans who told Gallup they prefer beer over wine and liquor in 2008: This thing could be big. Billy Beer big! Just don't let a couple of moonlighting political reporters make a Web video promoting it: The would be a very bad idea.