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Bear Stearns: The Satire Begins

This is hilarious.

Bear Measurisk uses a robust analytic framework built around a Monte Carlo simulation based Value-at-Risk (VaR) analysis and runs off a Lotus 123 spreadsheet and an old IBM 286 PC. For corporations, Bear Measurisk offers an earnings-at-risk model and a FAS 133 application to assist in calculating and reporting fair value (mark-to-market) for derivative instruments and underlying (hedged) exposure although when it comes to valuing our own CDO's, we just make the numbers up until we are found out. Like now.

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