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Oct 01 2008 10:30am EDT
Warning Signs of a Troubled Bank
Top Ten Signs Your Bank Is In Trouble:
Courtesy of the Late Show's David Letterman:
- Ask to withdraw $100 and they Xerox five twenties.
- Once a week, bank president is led away in handcuffs.
- Four out of five bank tellers are kitties.
- Was a Savings and Loan; now a Savings and Loan and Chicken Shack.
- "Vault" is the trunk of a late model Chevy Malibu.
- When you check account balance, ATM screen reads, "What money, sucka?"
- They tell bank robbers, "Sorry, the C.E.O. beat you to it."
- They tried to borrow money from you.
- When you ask where your money is, they say in an adorable Alaska accent, "I'll try to find it and I'll bring it to ya!"
- Instead of a mint, teller offers you an antidepressant.
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- Credit Crunched: A Special Report on Wall Street Chaos
